“There is a white wolf and a black wolf. The black wolf is filled with fear, anger, envy, jealousy, greed, and arrogance. The white wolf is filled with peace, love, hope, courage, humility, compassion, and faith. They battle constantly”.
I have known this story/proverb for many many years. I have spent much time exploring just what my dark wolf is about. I actually have found it intriguing in a way, delving into the shadow parts of myself.
{ must be part of the Scorpio nature} This exploration actually is pretty much a mandatory initiation into the world of shamanism, curanderismo, and other healing modalities, and so I had come to believe that I had successfully worked through this and become pals with my dark wolf.
Aha! Just when you think you know, you are given an opportunity that takes your perception and flips it on its side!
This opportunity often presents itself in the form of another human being.
The battle being waged inside oneself is one thing; to be engaged in a battle with the battle inside someone else, is another whole thing. And you can not win, but no one can tell you that. You have to keep learning over and over again, and the learning does not cease until you decide. Until you decide you can not fight someone else's battle. What happens in the process of trying to do so, is that your own dark wolf rises up, with gnashing teeth as sharp as swords, and your white wolf lays down.
Sometimes your white wolf is attacked and ridiculed. Oooh this is tough. Just when you think you were being peaceful and loving and compassionate.... you get slammed. What to do? Do you let the dark wolf out of the den?
It comes down to how you feel; what is important for you- what resonates with your highest vibrational self.
I have let that dark wolf out to wreak some havoc when backed in a corner, I hate to admit, and each time I have crawled back, scathed and wounded. Sometimes my dark wolf has come stealthily, in the form of martyrdom , attachments, and wounded self as well as scathing and seething. I have had to fully embrace the dark wolf and surround her with acceptance and acknowledgement, for this contrast within us all is part of being human. It is part of why we are even here. Awareness is huge, and to run from the shadow parts of yourself, or stuff them in an oversized box and think they will go away, will just not be helpful.
The dark wolf develops and forms from experiences, belief systems, past lives, past wounds, fears... all these are not " bad". We tend to categorize things as good or bad depending on a number of qualifying factors. Your dark wolf isn't all bad- it provides you with a contrast to what you want to be. If you want to be immersed in dark wolf ways, well, life aint gonna be too happy. Does the image of a dark swirling abyss come to mind here?
The only way out of the abyss is to acknowledge and accept the dark wolf, and then embrace the white wolf. This does not mean you back down and lose your self worth. { self loathing and constant self- admonishment is dark wolf stuff} Your white wolf will show you the way to honor and be honored. Your white wolf will seek help if things get too much. Your white wolf will always ask, " what would love do?" while also encouraging you to protect and love yourself. Your white wolf will help you walk away from harmful situations. Your white wolf is powerful without having to state it or prove it or lash out to defend itself. Be ready. Your dark wolf will come around, but if you know what to look for and recognize it for what it is, it will have no power over you. It will just be. Then you can turn your focus on white wolf stuff, like compassion, hope, service to others, peace.... and the more you align with those kinds of things, the more you create that way of living, and the more you will attract "white wolf people" into your life. Of course, all white wolf people have their bewildering dark wolves sleeping until provoked..... it is the way it is. That is why we choose to help one another; to understand another's pain. We recognize our own selves in others. The world outside comes from the world within. The white wolf calls. Will you answer?
